Can You Escape The Hood By Doing Hood Things?

Can you escape the hood by doing hood things?

This morning I was thinking about all the people I know who tried to escape the hood by lying, stealing and hustling.

These folks thought they had all the answers and did not listen to anyone.  Years ago they were the best dressed, very popular, and drove the hottest cars.  It looked like they had the world in the palm of their hands.

 I have run into some of these people and I was very surprised that some of them are homeless.  They outwitted themselves and now they didn't have anyone to turn to.

Fast money is a fast death and you cannot escape your environment by doing foul things.  You may escape for a short time but you will not sleep well at night and you will have to constantly look over your shoulder.

You will not be able to trust your friends because when you are living this way, you really don't have any friends and you will lose self-respect.

Taking shortcuts will lead to problems further down the road.

What Exactly Is Talking White Or Acting White?

What Exactly Is Talking White Or Acting White?


Image Courtesy Pixabay.

There are a lot of misconceptions regarding African American people who talk proper English.  They are often called Oreo's, talking white, sell-outs and etc.

Some people grow up in different environments or they are exposed to people of different races.  I have some in my family who so-called "talk white" and they are not trying to sell out at all.

My family members are very proud African Americans and many are. You do not know what people go through who grow up in mostly white neighborhoods, you will definitely not forget who you are and where you come from, that is for sure.

We have a tendency to put our people in a box that they don't belong in just because of your uneasiness.  It is no disgrace to use proper English.

All of us are not the same, talk to a person so you can get to know them and you can build great friendships.  It is unfair to make judgments based on a manner of speech.

Judge people by their character only!

Top Five Ways To Date Yourself.

Top five ways to date yourself.


Image courtesy of Pixabay

When you are not in a relationship it is easy to sit around and mope.  A lot of times you will not take care of yourself and your appearance.  Not being in a relationship doesn't mean that you just give up on life.


Image courtesy of Pixabay

There are many ways to date yourself, to make you feel special and loved.  Sometimes people notice when you do not treat yourself well and they view you as unattractive. Make it a point to date yourself because you will draw more quality people into your life.

So here are the top five ways to date yourself!

1. Go to a fabulous restaurant and order whatever you want and sit there and savor every bite.
2. Take yourself on a trip alone and meet people and treat yourself to the best massages around and pamper yourself.
3. Take a relaxing bath and put on your favorite music, get out and put on the prettiest nightgown that you own and eat some quality chocolates and watch  ("Breakfast At Tiffany's.)
4. Order a beautiful necklace or ring and use it as your statement piece.
5. Go get your hair, nails, and feet done, and then go to a photoshoot and take your best picture.

Learn how to be happy with yourself and you will enjoy yourself with or without a mate.

Sir, Why Are You So Negative???

Sir, Why Are You So Negative??


Image Courtesy Of Pixabay.

Recently, I was at an event and it was a married couple where the husband said something very negative to his wife, and I thought I was going to fall out of my chair.

I will not repeat what he said, but it was a reference to her looks and her as a woman.  She didn't say anything back to him because obviously, it is something that he normally does.

Mind you, this man is not Prince Charming himself and he should never say that to his wife.  On the other hand, his wife is beautiful, she has large doe eyes and they are really striking.

I am quite sure his wife spoke to him at home about this. What I am going to say regarding this is don't do this to your wife or any other person, have some respect and some class.

Mrs, please keep yourself up because when you don't, men notice.  It still doesn't excuse his behavior, but don't let him see you slipping.

Fix yourself up, and if he doesn't improve, then maybe you should consider making permanent changes in your marriage.

Frenemies and their motives.

Frenemies and their motives.


Image Courtesy Of Pixabay.

Frenemies are people who pretend to be your friend when they really hate you.  They are extremely jealous of you and your accomplishments and will undermine you at every turn.

In the past, I have had friends like this and you try to be a real friend and even keep the peace, but it gets tiring after a while.  They never were happy for me, and some talked about me behind my back and attempted to use me.

I was always in their corner and tried to be the best friend that I could, but I got the total opposite in return.  It is easy to spot a frenemy because they will force their way into your life, and they are very kind at first until they get closer to you and gain your trust.

Some of these frenemies will get close to you so they can get closer to the man in your life in an attempt to ruin your romantic relationship.

These people will try to put you down while smiling in your face or acting as if they got your back. The best way to deal with a frenemy is to know the signs and stay away from them.  It is very easy to spot them.

You ask them how your outfit looks and they will just shrug and say nothing or say " that outfit would look better on me".  Some will even mimic you by trying to wear the same clothes or hairstyles you do.

Some of them will try to undermine you at your place of work to get your position if your position is higher than theirs.  Stealing your close friends and talking about you is their modus operandi.

If you get married before they dom they will act like they are happy but you can see the disappointment in their eyes.

Frenemies can be any age and they are dangerous! They are so consumed by your life when they should be living their own.

I Faced Racial Discrimination On My Job!

I Faced Racial Discrimination On My Job!


Image Courtesy Of Pixabay.

First off, I am not a person who will blame everything on racial discrimination. Today, I was thinking about a time I was discriminated against by my employer.

Many years ago I used to work as an Administrative Assistant for an agency that helps poor, minority, and disenfranchised people.  A lot of these people were in fact homeless.

My boss seemed like she was friendly and I thought she had a heart of gold.  Her agency was very well known in the community, and she really did help clients get housing, jobs, and food.

I was given my assignments to do for the day, and I flipped the papers over, and it had racist words on the back that pertained to black people.  At first, I thought that someone else in the office had done this.

Each and every time I saw these words on the back of my work assignments it really sickened me.  I never said anything because I needed my job.

My boss constantly smiled at me and was kind, but I knew she had a problem with black people as a race.

I didn't stay in this job very long because I could not deal with all the discrimination I was facing.

Another employee told me that they were going through the same thing, and it is sad.

Make sure you research online the steps that it takes to lodge a discrimination lawsuit if this has happened to you.  Racial discrimination has no place in the workforce!

(Men) Top Don'ts In A Relationship.

(Men) Top Don'ts In A Relationship.


Image Courtesy Pixabay

Hello Gentlemen, these are tips for men to stop doing these things in their relationships.

1. If your girlfriend doesn't feel well, don't come over because she doesn't want any company.
2. If your girl is cooking expensive dishes, such as; shrimp, lobster, and oxtails.  "I Love Oxtails" do not show up with any of your friends unless she specifically invites them.
3. Do not absolutely, do not come to her house with extra clothes (trying to move in on the sly) because she didn't ask you to move in.
4. Do not kiss her if your breath smells bad.
5. Do not show up at her house late if she told you to come by 7pm, do not come at 11pm.
6. Do not come to her house with five of your kids if she didn't ask you to.
7. Don't keep the toilet seat up because she hates that.
8. Do not text someone while you are at her house. (this is disrespectful.)
9. Please do not avoid calling her for three weeks and then just show up at her house unannounced.
10. Do not have her thinking you are going to marry her if you do not intend to.

These rules are very easy to follow and she will love you for being considerate.  Please leave comments if you would like to leave even more tips.

She Forgot She Was A Child (Very Short Story)

She forgot she was a child.

Image Courtesy Pixabay.

 This is one of my short stories and I hope you enjoy it. I like to post them from time to time.

Lena was barely eleven-years-old and she carried the world on her shoulders.  Many times she was scared to smile and people thought she had such a hard exterior.

Lena was wise beyond her years, but she yearned to be free to live like a child because she forgot that she was a child.  Lena was a great student despite what she was going through and she excelled in everything she put her mind to.

She wasn't as hard as people thought she was because, every night, her pillow held her tears and her secrets, in fact, she was very afraid of her future. So she prayed, and prayed, that God would intervene.

God did intervene but it took such a long time. She never gave up her faith and I believe it carried her a long way.  Lena is a nurturer and it is what she is made of. She cares so much and always wants to help out.

Years passed and Lena became a woman, all the pain and inner scars taught her to be strong and it also taught her about forgiveness.  She is now happy and she has the gift to counsel others who have been through what she went through.

This young lady also learned that you are in charge of your own happiness and she refused to wallow in self-pity, Yes, her life was not ideal but with God's help she changed it into what she wanted it to be.

The moral of this short story is to never give up and excel in spite of your difficulties and lean on your faith and it will get you through.

Young Lady Has Been Having Babies Since She Was Thirteen, Now On Her Tenth Child

Young Lady Has Been Having Babies Since She Was Thirteen, Now On Her Tenth.
 
Image Courtesy Pixabay.

I saw a young lady today, and she started having babies when she was Thirteen years old.  She is under thirty-five years old, and she has ten children.

She is a nice-looking young lady, and I cannot understand how this syndrome started because that is what it is.  What happened to her to make her think that she needs ten kids?

What tragedy started this, and why is she continuing to think this way and make it harder for her to work in a career she loves? Maybe she just loves children but I don't think that it is normal for a woman to do this at such a young age.

I believe her oldest child is an adult already and I hope that she has a different mindset than her mom.  I love children, and I think they are a blessing from God, but it isn't a lot you can offer your kids when you have too many children.

I wonder did her mom try to intervene and she still did not listen.  I saw one of the fathers of her children many years ago, and frankly, he was very childish and doesn't appear like he is serious about life.

Please don't waste your time having babies with these men who get you pregnant and are not willing to help you financially and otherwise.

Even if a man would be willing to love and provide for you, there is only so much he can do with ten kids in the family.

Having a lot of babies at a young age isn't cute, and honestly, I don't know her religious beliefs but she is not being a good mother by having so many children.

She cannot work because she has so many children, and no one will care for the kids she can work with.  Heck, it doesn't even pay for her to work because she will never make enough money to provide for these children.

I would love to see some programs put into place for young teen moms to prevent another out-of-wedlock birth, and to tell these young ladies, what will happen if they have too many children.

Her family failed her, the system failed her, and she failed herself. I wish the best for the young lady and hope by some miracle, she will find the love and self-esteem that could have prevented this.

Talk to, love and support your young daughters and surround them with positive images so they won't only see themselves as a mom at a very young age.

(Video) How To Stop Being A Doormat

Stop Being A Doormat.

Sometimes it is easier said than done but some of us have lived the lifestyle of being agreeable and taking the backseat when we should have been more present and expressed what we are really feeling.  There are people who are a doormat and don't even know that they are because this is what they have seen in their life.

This video below is very pertinent and an eye-opener and it gives insight on how to change this behavior.

Life Is Not All Flowers ( daily life problems)

Life Is Not All Flowers (daily life problems)

Life is beautiful but sometimes things can come to knock you off your feet and cause confusion and a lot of us women know that most problems fall into our plate, so to speak.

We carry such loads and burdens and people don't realize that it can be overwhelming at times.  We have to be everything to everybody and it is hard to fathom that this can take its toll on our health, mentally and physically.

The fact is, we are the ones who need the pep talk, the pat on the back, and just a listening ear. The most common daily problems can be avoided when you just put your pride down and ask for help or put some of your tasks off for another day if possible.

Don't be scared to say no to some family members who overwhelm you with their issues, you have to step back sometimes.

Turning off your phone and not taking any calls unless it is an extreme emergency is sometimes necessary to take a break and take the time to do some of the things that you love.

I love to plan shopping trips alone so I can think and just enjoy my own company.  This gives me the time to relax and even have lunch alone and I truly enjoy it.

Learn to be assertive and let people know where you are coming from to keep from making excuses and don't let people make you free bad for not helping them.

Please don't let anyone stress you out because stress can cause disease and life is too short.  Find your happy place and live your best life.

(Video) Don't Give Men Money.

Don't Give Men Money.

Ladies, there are so many men trying to get over on women and use them as their personal Bank.  So many women start this practice and in the end, they end up with bad credit and all sorts of problems.  Make this man be a man and get off his behind and contribute to you and your household and if he isn't willing to take his rightful place in your life, then you should let him go.

This same man will meet someone else and be willing to give her the world, you are worth more ladies.  It is easier than you think that it is, just say no! When you tell him no and really mean it, he will show you where he is coming from.  Either he will leave you or he will man up.

Below is a video of this knowledgeable woman giving you advice that you can really take to heart and stop being used.

Do Your Social Media Followers Have To Know Everything About You?

Do Your Social Media Followers Have To Know Everything About You?


Image Courtesy Of Pixabay.

When you are on Social Media we tend to get more relaxed talking about ourselves and it is easy to forget about safety and things that we should not reveal on the Internet.

There are some YouTubers who have put their trust in their followers and have revealed private information about themselves in casual conversations but some of their viewers have chosen to use this info to troll them and cause chaos in their lives.

People will support you but they have itching ears and want to learn any or everything about your life and it is none of their business.

Be very careful what you reveal to the public because these are strangers who do not know you and you don't know exactly who is watching, it could be anyone and there are also people who will hate you for no reason at all.

Please do not let anyone know where you are going in your videos because a stranger could show up who doesn't like you for one reason or another and it could be a dangerous situation.

You can always go to your event and upload your video weeks later.  Be very careful who you talk to about your private business because it can come back to bite you later on.

Think very carefully before you share your spouse online because so many people like to interfere in relationships and it will be a recipe for disaster because jealous or envious people will make it their business to break up your happy home.

Never discuss personal aspects of your relationship with anyone and keep your marriage woes to yourself unless your marriage is over.

Keep your children safe online and never reveal their exact whereabouts or their school info, it is nobody's business!

Stay clear of social media cliques because there are many and they are a breeding ground for gossip and confusion.  You think they are your friends but they are not.

Being personable is very interesting and people get to know a lot about you but is it really worth the problems that it can bring?

Think about it before you reveal it? 

He Went To Jail And You Waited For Him And Now He Is Out And Cheating On You.

Ladies, I just heard about a story and the man went to jail for some years and his girlfriend waited for him the whole time he was gone.  She was his queen, so she thought, but as soon as he got out, he cheated on her.

This man took this woman's soft heart for granted because he needed her while he was in jail.  She didn't get much out of this relationship and he takes her for granted.

This lady is a sweetheart but obviously, she was looking for love in the wrong places.  Why is his life more important than hers?

This is a lesson to us all, we all have been weak and fallen short somewhere, but I want ladies to know that you have to place yourself higher than this man you are dating or in a serious relationship with.

You should love your man but he should be loving you too and be willing to sacrifice for your well-being and happiness.

Stop selling yourself short, a lot of you are doing everything and the man isn't doing anything.  The relationship should be on an equal footing.

You are afraid that if you stop doing these things, he will leave you, but if a man doesn't love you, he will leave you anyway.

If you are a doormat, he will get sick of this and the woman who will put her foot down and make him be a man, he will be absolutely crazy about this woman and do and be everything that she needs him to be.

Love Yourself First!

Why Is It Okay For Him To Cheat While In Our Marriage But I Cannot?

Image Courtesy Of Pixabay

Why is it okay for him to cheat while in our marriage but I cannot?

Anonymous Question: Hello, Sashamonique, I have been married for twenty-two years and my husband has been stepping out on me with other women since day one. I told him the other day that I was seeing someone but I want to try to save our marriage, he looked at me and slapped me in the face very hard.

I asked why he was so mad because he has a harem of women he dates and he said “I can do whatever the hell I want to do” he feels like he is a king and every woman should bow down and do everything that he wants them to do. I am tired of this man. The new man isn't any prize either but I feel happy when I am with him. Honestly, he is a womanizer also. Should I make my husband leave so I can be with my new man?

Sashamoniquetalks: That is a long time to be married and going through this sort of thing. Your husband has been taking you for granted and I don't even know why you are still dealing with this. I understand that marriage is not perfect but do we have to suffer in it, no! He wants to do what he wants to do and you should be accepting of his behavior, I think not.

Tell your husband that if he wants this marriage to work he better clean up his act or you are out the door. I am saying you are out the door because it doesn't sound like your husband will be the one leaving.

About this new man, you need to find out why you keep picking men who are not willing to just date you because this is a never-ending pattern of your life. The new man is fun right now because he doesn't have any responsibilities regarding you. Find your happiness elsewhere than with this new man who isn't faithful as well. You deserve better.

Listening is fundamental to your success.

Listening is fundamental to your success.

We live in a society where everyone is running around living by their own rules. They never consider other people's opinions and in the long run, they will start to run into major problems. You say that if only they would have listened their result would have been more positive.

 When you only listen to your voice or people who lack the skills to carry on an intelligent conversation or mindset, you will find that you will constantly run into a brick wall.

No one has all the answers, not even me, but there is always someone who has lived a story similar to your own and can tell you how they got through their situations.

 You do not have to agree with everything that is said but keep your heart and mind open so that you can grow and attract positive, responsible, experiences.

A closed-minded person can never grow because they feel that they have all the answers and when they fall, they will often come back to the person who was trying to help them in the beginning.

 Being prideful will not get you anywhere in this life because you will find that rules are meant to be followed, to constantly break them is truly insane.

Do not be your own worst enemy. Listening is fundamental.

Whatever Happened To Lorenzo??

Image Courtesy Of Pixabay 

  Whatever happened to Lorenzo??

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is a true account but I have changed the names to protect the innocent. Lorenzo was a young man with dreams and aspirations, he liked nice clothes and he had a beautiful smile.

 He was a nice young man but we noticed that Lorenzo took the easy way out when it came to making his money. Lorenzo lived on the rough side of town but everybody just knew that he would make it out of the hood unscathed. He had charisma and a soft side and he attracted very beautiful and classy women.

We didn't know exactly what Lorenzo did to make his living but we knew that with the little minimum wage job that he had, he couldn't afford a lot of things that he was purchasing. His mom was a very sweet woman and he loved her and would do anything for her.

 She never questioned how he made his money. Lorenzo's dad was not around so he couldn't depend on anyone else for financial support. He took matters into his own hands and decided that he would be the man that his family needed.

So long story short, many years passed and I often wondered what happened to Lorenzo. I started doing searches online and I came across a picture of this weary man wearing rags and he was very unkempt.

Life caught up to Lorenzo and his money-making activities finally resulted in homelessness and jail time. The moral of this short story is, fast money leads to death and destruction and there is no way out of your situation than doing the right thing.

 Education plays a big part in your future and your future employment and staying on the right track is very important.

Was Lorenzo a bad person? no, he wasn't but life took its toll and he saw no way out of his situation. Life moves very fast and I wish that someone could have intervened before his life turned into the mess that it is.

 There is hope and a chance for redemption and this is just an account of how we are a product of our environment. I am hoping and praying that the next news I hear about Lorenzo will be good and he has changed his life.

If you like short stories such as this one, please comment below.